We thrive off of doing. Often rushing if not in our bodies in our minds. Ahead of ourselves before the moment is over. What next? What to do ? Who to Call? Who to see?
It’s even built into our language: Run to pick up groceries, grab a bite to eat, throw something together, be it an outfit or a meal. We create so many schedules for ourselves, so many important things to rush through. We even leave them to the last minute only to experience the extra pressure.
I was in that mode. Not for any particular reason. I just was. I literally fell into the trap of rushing time. One day I was running across the living room to iron my outfit. Suddenly my feet stopped in their tracks but the rest of my body kept going. I went sailing through the air and crashed on the floor. My shoulder hit hard and I could not move the left side of my body. I lay there in agony sweating and shaking in disbelief and shock. From rushing to not being able to move.
Deep breaths helped me stay present. It flashed through my mind that it's morning and no one would be home until evening. I might die here! I have to get to a phone.
Somehow I inched across the floor fully aware now of each painful movement. Each one carefully, very carefully examined. Would my arm snap? Would I make it? I have no recollection of how I finally reached my phone on the counter. I know grace had a hand in it. Rescue was on the way. A dear friend was at my side in minutes.
I wondered what would have been different if I had just slowed down in my body/mind and let them work together -- take in life instead of trying to beat it. What if I had taken that walk across the room with careful awareness lifting each foot instead of trying to “get there.” I would have arrived in one piece and my intended task would have still been completed.
What I’ve gleaned from my experience is if we don’t slow down eventually something will slow us down. That something usually shows up in our body or our mind. It doesn’t have to be a catastrophic event. Just enough to remind us to take things easy.
I know things happen and we certainly don’t need to berate ourselves for what we didn’t do. Being aware of them is the key to change. If we are always worrying about the future or dwelling on the past, we are not being present and are always trying to catch up with ourselves. Being present means aligning our body and mind, so we fully participate in the task before us in a more relaxed way.
Our conditioning is to compete, get ahead, get things done, multitask in a stressful manner.
All this is very much a survival mode of being. Changing that takes a mindset, focused breathing and practice.
I’m still learning not to jog along to the frenetic pace of the world to the tune of expectation. Instead my intention is to slip into the rhythm of my own body and dance its dance.
I know this place, I remember it in my soul. I have to keep returning to it again and again until one day it’s where I live all the time.
Love and Light
Lynn